COVID19 is the Perfect Time to Up Your Phone Sex Skills

Nothing kills your sex drive the way a plague does. 

Still, the fact that we’re living through this one confirms that humans have managed to stir something up during previous pandemics. 

Among the complexities that this virus has provoked in our daily living, here’s what I’m seeing on the relationship front: 

My cohabitating couples are blowing up my inbox about the challenges of too much togetherness, and the rest of you are bemoaning how unfair it is that you don’t live with your partners. 

Let me clarify: People who live together are not having sex right now. We’re trying not to kill each other. 

For those of you who do not live with your partners, this seems like the perfect time to ramp up your phone sex game, particularly since modern phones enable us to see each other.

Although, before you jump into bed and fire up FaceTime, consider using audio only. Like, a straight up old school phone call. Here’s why:

When we can’t see our partner, our other senses become heightened. Just ask anyone who’s been blindfolded (presuming you haven’t).

Inhibiting one sense not only heightens the others – there’s something about not being seen that allows us to loosen up; to access a less inhibited part of our personality. 

The absence of sight forces us to use language in ways we’re not used to. And that use of language – of description – lights up our right brain which is the part that’s creative, that controls our feelings, that sees in images, that daydreams, and that fantasizes.

Basically, if you’re not already talking dirty in bed, consider phone sex your training wheels. 

So, ask your partner to describe their fantasies. Then, ask questions. Explicit ones. Which prompts more phone sex. You see how this works, right? 

Use this time to find new and creative ways of getting your relationship needs met. Just remember to wash your hands. And disinfect your phone.