Blurred Boundaries

Dear Dr. Darcy:

My girlfriend’s best friend has recently begun sending me suggestive text messages. As much as I know it’s wrong, I can’t help responding back to her. At first it seemed like innocent flirting, but I have to admit that I’ve become attracted to her. I’ve been with my girlfriend for 5 months and we’re just about to move in together and I’m starting to freak out over my feelings for her best friend. Should I postpone the move?


Interesting timing… Sounds like you’re freaking out about more than your feelings for her best friend. I’m betting you’re freaking out about moving in with your girlfriend. I wonder how you’ve handled commitments in the past. I don’t believe in coincidences for the most part, and it’s odd that although you’ve known her best friend for months, you realize you have feelings for her just as you’re about to cohabitate with your girlfriend. There is no such thing as ‘innocent flirting,’ particularly with your girlfriend’s best friend. Some things are simply off-limits: Her female relatives (actually, all relatives), her intern, her roommate, etc. There are enough women in this world to flirt with ~ stay away from those in her world. It’s bad enough that you’re likely sabotaging your relationship with your girlfriend. Don’t take down her best friend too.