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Dear Dr. Darcy:

I’ve been dating a guy for 3 weeks. I’m not wild about him and in fact there are things about him that are a turn off to me which is probably why I haven’t slept with him yet. More importantly, I’ve hardly done more than make out with him. The other day I received a text from him out of nowhere and it said: DTF? Is it me, or is that inappropriate to text someone before you’re sleeping with them?


Do me a favor and forward this to him:

Dear Mr. Romantic:

The first weeks of dating someone are critical in terms of closing the deal.  A successful man knows how to up the excitement factor by planning unusual dates, seducing a woman over beautiful dinners and making sure he remains in her thoughts by sending thoughtful texts in between dates.  Texting a woman the question DTF (down to fuck?) does not qualify as a thoughtful text. It’s beyond immature, it’s crass and it's likely to deflate any sexual attraction a woman may have budding for you.

I can’t help but wonder what you were hoping her response would be… Did you imagine you might receive a naked picture of her with an enthusiastic YES?

You, Mr. Romantic, are a loser. You will never close a deal with a mindset that allows you to send texts like that. It’s not just the text itself… It’s your skewed belief system which determined that sending that text was a good idea. I suspect the text was the tip of the iceberg. Good luck to you.

Writer’s stats: Female, Straight.