Here’s the thing about relationship skills: They’re skills. We’re not born with them. We’re taught them. Most of us are taught them by people who are statistically more likely to be divorced than happily married: Our parents.
Luckily we’re never too old to learn something new. But to turn information into a habit takes practice. Daily practice. Below is a list of the 5 habits that will have the greatest positive impact on your relationships. All of them. You can practice these on everyone in your life (and you should). I suggest you pick 3 and put recurring reminders into your calendar for 30 days to practice them. Then again, I’m not a fan of information unless I take action on it.
1. Take a walk. Literally. Ten minutes a day, walk outside with anyone (ideally, someone you like).
2. Catch ‘em doing something right. Then tell them. Feeling stuck? Here’s a list of things that people strive to be.
3. Set a daily intention. Don’t just wake up and throw yourself into your day. Take 60 seconds and decide the impact you want to have on someone’s life each day.
4. Forgive. Then move on. Forgiveness is a choice. You haven’t truly forgiven if you hold a grudge or bring up history when you’re upset (history = something you’ve previously accepted an apology for).
5. Take turns speaking. Don’t speak over or interrupt when someone’s speaking. I get it. I have ADHD. Impulse control is not one of my top strengths. Plus I’m Jewish and Spanish. And a New Yorker. It takes discipline to wait for your turn. That’s why I want you to practice daily for 30 days.